Dear Little One,
Sometimes you feel far away. Like I’ll never reach you. Like you’re in a completely different life than the one I’m living now.
Maybe that’s common with things you want most. You want them so bad that it feels almost impossible that you will actually get them. Or like you don’t deserve them because you’re not taking the time to be grateful for what you have now.
I have so much, Little One, but I’ll admit, I want more. And as much as I’d like to get to you as fast as I can, I also want to take my time. Because I know I won’t have everything I have now when I find you. I know things will be different, and that scares me.
In a way I think we live many different lives inside the one we’re given. And though it hurts to know you exist somewhere in the next one, I know I owe it both to you and to me to enjoy the one I’m in right now. Even it hurts sometimes. Even if it feels like everyone is pressuring me to move through it quickly. Even if it sometimes feels like I’m a failure without you.
When I get to you, I want to have loved this life. I want to love myself. I want to know who I am and how I got to you so that I can hopefully help you find your way, and help you take your time.
Don’t rush, Little One, and I won’t either.
See you soon.
Letters From Then 